Justin Cherot's Bracket Press Conference Coverage

The following is a transcript of Justin Cherot's March Madness Press Conference

Moderator: Ladies and gentlemen... wait, it looks like there's only one of you... okay, sir, I'd like to welcome you to Justin Cherot's press conference on the eve of the 2009 NCAA Tournament. In a moment we'll welcome Mr. Cherot to the stage, where he'll briefly share some thoughts about this upcoming tournament and field questions. Keeping in mind that we have time limitations (his daughter is about to wake up in less than 45 minutes), we'd politely ask to keep questions limited to the topic of the tournament and nothing else. Thank you. Now, without further ado, bracket pool legend, Justin Cherot.

Cherot: Thank you, Mr. unnamed moderator. Due to a lack of advertising budget I wasn't able to get any bigger names but thank you for being here. Folks... okay, I see there's only one of you... sir, first off I'd like to express my excitement for the madness returning. I somehow made it through that long, exhausting regular season which saw good teams choke, underdogs prevail, and NBA scouts yawn. Now comes the real fun part, March Madness, a time when virtually anything can happen... well, except for a 16 beating a one. It's just not going to happen this year, just like every other year the field of 64 or 65 has existed.

What I usually do during my previews is I breakdown every single game and my reasons for making such bold and, at times, irrational predictions. In an attempt not to bore my very few readers who have ADD, I am simply going to link to my bracket.

My reason for holding this brief press conference is simple. My recent struggles at doing these things is well-documented, having not recorded a pool win since Carmelo Anthony set the world on fire in 2003. I know I've been saying this for the past few years, but I anticipate this year to be my big comeback. I have prepared feverishly for this month, and my homework over the past several months will prove more than worth the trouble.

Thank you.

Moderator: We will now field questions from the press... all one of you. Go ahead, sir.

Crazy Bone: Remember me, from last year you [expletive]!?

Cherot: I don't seem to recall.

Crazy Bone: "Don't seem to recall." Nice selective memory. Cite me when I pick Florida to win the title in 2000 and Syracuse to win in 2003, BLAME ME when you haven't won a pool since Lindsay Lohan was still considered adorable.

Cherot: That was a long time ago.

Crazy Bone: Whatever, I'm not here to pick a fight with you. I'm just here to analyze the bracket you made without my help. I have some questions.

Cherot: Shoot.

Crazy Bone: Not a ton of upsets in the first round, three number ones in the Final Four. In a year where there's a ton of parity, what the [expletive] are you thinking?

Cherot: I'll start with the first round. I admit that only five upsets, two of which are eight/nine games that are basically only "de-seedings", seems a little light for me. But, in my recent struggles I have noticed a disturbing trend: either I shoot out to a huge lead or I'm completely out of the running after day one. From a strategic standpoint, going for less upsets in round one makes sense. From a basketball standpoint, I just don't see that many upsets in round one. I definitely see Arizona, Maryland, and Western Kentucky advancing as double digit seeds because, quite frankly, I feel that they're better than the teams they match-up against. But beyond that, I can't see any mid-major magic. As for the Final Four, you're right: I do have three number ones there, with kind of an asterisk on Carolina. News broke a few hours ago about Ty Lawson not being readyfor Radford. It won't really matter in round one, but it could hurt them later on. I'm thinking about an addendum to that part of the bracket, but as far as I'm concerned if Lawson plays nobody's beating the Tar Heels.


Crazy Bone: What about the one exception to the Final Four, the Wake Forest Demon Deacons?

Cherot: They've struggled lately a little bit, but I think they're a hard team to beat because of all the athleticism they throw at their opposition. I'm not sky-high on Louisville because sometimes they just downright don't show up, and in a game that should be entertaining with as many as eight future NBA players together on the same court, I just think Wake's guard play takes them over the top. Everybody talks about Jeff Teague, but Ish Smith is becoming just as dangerous.

Crazy Bone: Not bad, not bad. Okay, so not too many first round upsets and a fairly stable Final Four. But, you go a little crazy in the second and third round. Case and point: Maryland as an Elite Eight team. This is a team that just squeaked in at the buzzer! How can you justify them getting into the Elite Eight?

Cherot: Funny you should mention that. I just got a call from one of my friends saying verbatim, "You can never be an analyst. You wouldn't have Maryland beating them if you didn't go to Maryland."

Crazy Bone: ...okay.

Cherot: To be honest, he's right. As a matter of fact, they can just as easily lose to California in the first round. But that's been Maryland all season. When they're good, they're really good, scary good considering their lack of athleticism and size. When they're bad, they can lose to Virginia in a game that almost ruined their season. With the way they're playing right now, they're definitely teetering more to the positive side. I've been noticing a disturbing trend with the Terps: they tend to play their best against teams that are far more athletic than them. They tend to play their worst against scrappy teams without a ton of talent but that can outwork them. Look at the wins against Carolina and Wake. No way on paper they should even be in those games. But, that's how good of a coach Gary Williams is. He could take a piece of lint and turn it into a BMW.

Crazy Bone: That doesn't even make sense.

Cherot: Call it what you want, but after careful consideration I'm keeping the Terps in the Elite Eight.

Crazy Bone: Do you see another Stephen Curry-like emergence from any one player in the field?

Cherot: Texas' A.J. Abrahams, Siena's Kenny Hasbrouck if he can somehow get them in the Sweet Sixteen, maybe a re-emergence from Villanova's Scotty Reynolds... I dunno. There's nobody like Steph.

Crazy Bone: Last question: if UNC loses, do you think they can blame it on the the Obama curse?

Cherot: Hey, if McCain won, he would have picked NJIT.

Moderator: Uh, and that concludes this press conference. Thank you all for attending... or just you, Mr. Bone. Thank you for coming.

Crazy Bone: Good luck to you, sir. Hope you won't finish last... again.